Throughout the fifty plus years they were married, David and Ann assumed he would be the first to go. They planned out their life together on that assumption. But, a few years ago, they got a nasty surprise. Ann was diagnosed with lung cancer. She was told that without treatment, she had only two to three weeks to live, with treatment, perhaps six to nine months. "It was like we were kicked in the stomach," David says.
Ann was not melodramatic: she didn't rail against a cruel fate, she never questioned God. She knew she was dying, and she and David faced it together, supported by a large family and an army of friends. Like the general's daughter that she was, she planned her final campaign. David says it was hard for him to hear her speak of her death, although the two of them always discussed treatment options, Ann made the final decisions. She left David and their daughters numerous letters and instructions on a variety of topics. "She was the traditional general's daughter," David says.
David and Ann were not strangers to H. Lee Moffitt Cancer Center & Research Institute. So when trouble struck in the form of lung cancer, they knew where to turn. David had a connection with Moffitt through his father, and Ann, among her many community service and fundraising activities ("My Ann was a classic fundraiser," David says) sat on the Board of Directors. But she wasn't a typical board member, David says: "She was unique. She never just took up a seat."
Part of their personal campaign as a couple battling this disease, was Ann's activism and her desire to help others. "She wanted to make a difference for future patients," David says. David remembers her asking, "How can I take this situation I am in and make it positive?" She found a way to do that at Moffitt. During her treatment, she gave several talks at the center -- to the staff to make sure they knew how much they were helping people, and to patients and their families about her own experiences. She kept up her campaign until her death in 2005.
Ann and David were able to witness Moffitt from both sides, giving and receiving. "You are never ready to accept it until it happens," he says. "I felt privileged to take care of her." He had lots of good help along the way. After Ann died, he wrote more than 475 thank-you notes.
<< previous story | next story >>
